Tomorrow is my last day at work before I leave. I told my bosses about this a month ago. I can tell that while they are really happy for me, they are also really bummed out at the same time. I was talking to one of my bosses the other day and she commented, "You know Carli, a few of us think you might not be coming back. I don't know what we are going to do without you."
It hit me at that point, that while I do really love everyone I work with, my job here at home is not what I want to do forever. It's not something I can do forever. This job in California...THAT is what I want to do forever.
I replied to my boss, "I will be back on the 27th!" in an enthusiastic voice, but deep down, I know that I am more than ready to move out to California. If I had a long term job opportunity in LA, I'd be out there in a heartbeat. I'd make it work, and I think my bosses know that. I actually overheard two of them talking and they are under the impression that this opportunity may lead to other ones. I've also heard the same comment from my parents and a couple friends. I am lucky enough to have some great people in my life who support me 100%. I actually got a card in the mail last week from a family friend, someone who has known me since I was five. The card made me cry.
It's funny because in the beginning, it never even occured to me that this could lead to something else. I was so excited about this job, I wasn't really thinking about the future. Nothing in the world would make me happier than getting a full time job offer from this, moving out to LA and actually being able to go to work every day at a job that I love. That said, nothing has ever been handed to me, everyone has to work for what they want in life. I am ready to go out there and show everyone that I am dead serious about wanting this. I will work harder than I've ever worked in my life because this is all I've ever wanted in life. If I did get a long term job offer.. Holy shit. That'd be it. I'd have officially conquered my dream.
Right now, all I am focused on is giving my all at this job. That is what matters the most. The future is important to me, but this job is all that has been on my mind for the past two months. I know I am more than capable of doing a great job, and I will. I'm not worried about that. I'm just really REALLY excited to experience what this job has to offer.
What I AM nervous about is being in the city by myself. I've been to LA tons of times, but always with a friend or family member. Never by myself. I'm not going to lie, it's a little intimidating. I know 2 or 3 people in town, but I assume that I will by by myself on most of my days off. I don't know what I'll do with myself. I want to see Venice Beach. I've never been there. I could go to City Walk. I could go to Santa Monica. I REALLY want to see a Laker Game. I don't know, I'm sure I'll figure it out. I'm just not great at being alone. I guess it's something I need to get used to if I want to move out there sometime soon.
Alright, I'm going to wrap this up. I probably won't blog again before I go. Maybe I'll have some time to write on one of my days off while I am there.
I am ready. I am ready for this. I will miss my dog more than anything, but I know he will be okay here without me. I've been gone for weeks at a time before and he did alright. Plus, my little brother and sister promised to put him on the web cam occasionally while I am gone. Yeah, I am "that" girl. Anyways..like I said..I am ready. I am ready for this (possible) life changing experience. Wish me luck!
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